Dumb & Dumber

Back in August, I awarded myself the Dumbass Award. Click here to read that blog. I had managed to disable my central air conditioning in the middle of August in Texas and decided that was about the dumbest thing I could remember doing.

Never let it be said that I’m not competitive. I think I outdid myself recently. As I announced awhile back, I’ve changed all the titles of my Fancy series novellas to make them more recognizable as a series. For instance, the original title of Vol 5 of that series didn’t even contain the word “Fancy.” How confusing was that?

The changes were minor. The introductory volume, previously called Fancy, is now titled Fancy Vol 1. Changes in the others were similarly small. Making the changes was a relatively simple matter—just submit the new covers and new text with the new title reflected.

As far as I knew, everything was just fine. All were accepted by the respective websites. Good to go.

Then, I ordered 20 copies of vol 1 to take to a book signing event, and I received 20 copies of vol 2 instead. I called CreateSpace, and they apologized and agreed to resend the order. Again, I received 20 copies of vol 2. Another phone call, and again they agreed to send the proper books.

For the third time, I received 20 copies of vol 2. I now had 60 copies of the wrong book. Livid, I called CreateSpace once again, this time asking to speak to a manager. When he came on the line, rather than quickly agree to send new books, he said he would look into why this kept happening.

It turned out they had the cover for vol 2 attached to the interior of vol 1. I looked at the ones I’d been receiving, and, sure enough, they really were vol 1. They just had the wrong cover. The man told me to resubmit the cover and they’d replace the order once again.

When I tried to open the cover in Adobe to be sure I had the right one, I got a message that the file was corrupted. I couldn’t open it, so I still couldn’t tell whether I’d sent them the correct cover and they’d screwed it up somehow or I’d actually sent them the wrong cover. I got in touch with my cover artist, and he sent me a new, uncorrupted file, which I then submitted to CreateSpace.

Unfortunately, anytime you change anything about a book with CreateSpace, they take it back through their entire examination process. I still don’t have the book with the proper cover on it. Hopefully, it will be approved in time to get the books to me for the book signing event.

Meanwhile, I’m left scratching my head over how this could have happened. Am I the dumbest author in the history of self-publishing, or is all of this their fault? I don’t suppose I’ll ever have the answer to that one.

Meanwhile, I’ve got 60 copies of a book I can’t sell or even give away publicly. I can give a few to personal friends, but what about the rest of them. My wife has already told me they’re not going to sit around our house for the next millennium. We don’t use our fireplace, so I can’t use them for that. Anybody need some paper for starting fires?

Speaking of Fancy Vol 1, as I recently announced, the e-versions are available on Smashwords for free. Click here to download your free copy.

By the way, in case you missed it, Susie Lindau posted another of her “Use Me and Abuse Me” days yesterday. Click here to see her blog. Read it and leave a comment with a link to a favorite blog of your own. And while you’re there, check out some of the other blogs listed in other people’s comments.

Hey, I’m getting tired of being the dumbest author around. Tell us about some move you made which turned out to be somewhat less than brilliant. Inquiring minds want to know.

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WANA: We may not have it all together, but together we have it all.

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For more information about David N. Walker, click the “About” tab above.

For more information about his books, click on “Books” above.

Contact him at dnwalkertx (at) gmail (dot) com or tweet him at @davidnwalkertx.

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About David N. Walker

David N. Walker is a Christian husband, father and grandfather, a grounded pilot and a near-scratch golfer who had to give up the game because of shoulder problems. A graduate of Duke University, he spent 42 years in the health insurance industry, during which time he traveled much of the United States. He started writing about 20 years ago and has been a member and leader in several writers' groups. Christianity 101: The Simplified Christian Life, the devotional Heaven Sent and the novella series, Fancy, are now available in paperback and in Kindle and Nook formats, as well as through Smashwords and Kobo. See information about both of these by clicking "Books" above.
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20 Responses to Dumb & Dumber

  1. Julie Glover says:

    Well, I think you already read about how I’ve run into two different cars in my own driveway…which was capital-D Dumb. I think we all have our mistakes, and it’s especially frustrating when our attempt to correct the issue becomes another oops. Hang in there! Hope you get it resolved soon!

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  2. Barb Estinson says:

    I like Karlene’s idea. If you have trouble finding a school or organization to give them to, you could even leave copies in public places …. doctors’ offices, laundromats, etc. Who knows who might pick one up and decide they have to find the others in the sequence.

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  3. David – Don’t get me started on what I’ve done dumb – and that’s just today. We can start with my being lost for 4 hours in the town where I live!

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    • In Conway? Didn’t know the town had four hours worth of lost, Sheri.

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      • David – I don’t like to think about how much Conway has grow since we moved here late 2005. At that time it wasn’t a problem to get across town in 15 minutes and be on 40 to Little Rock. Now we have to allow a minimum of 30 minutes and that’s if we take the back roads to reach 40. At the time we moved here, population was almost 50,000. We’re coming up on 62,000! Soon 40 between LR and Conway will be 3 lanes each way. Our housing market never took a hit. The prices continue to climb in all categories. And unfortunately, I never go downtown. I get around LR, DC, LA, San Fran and many other large cities both in the US and in Europe. Put me in a small town, you can color me lost.

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  4. Ugh, I’m sorry for the setback. These complications are so annoying, and I also hope you get it resolved soon. One time I uploaded a cover to CS and when they put it on the product page, it looked like an x-ray! I don’t even know how that happened.

    As for misery loves company, I often wonder how I can be smart in some things and really dumb in others. Human nature I guess.

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  5. Karlene says:

    David, I am so sorry this happened to you. I’m thinking the second time…an investigation with someone might have been in order. But…what to do with them? You could give them to a charity, to a school that can’t afford books…etc. Reading is a gift. Maybe this all happened because this gift needs to be shared. Good luck.

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  6. Barb Estinson says:

    Well, I’m not a published author, but I can rival you for dumb things. The most recent I can recall is that on Tuesday, a groomer working on Booboo told me that she had a large sty on her eye. I was alarmed and immediately made an appointment with our vet. Then I told Brittany about it, and she reminded me that she had told me the same thing in August. I have no memory of that. I can’t believe I spaced it out and did nothing for over two months. Turns out the vet does not think it is a tumor, but it’s not a sty either, and we need to take her to a vet who specializes in ophthalmology. At least it isn’t painful, according to the vet …. but my poor little girl ……

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  7. Emma says:

    Thanks for the chuckle. When these things happen, I prefer to laugh than cry. Hope it gets sorted for you soon.

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  8. Carole McKee says:

    David, Check your shoes. I think they’re mine. :-}

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  9. Sharon Walker says:

    I continue to make mistakes. It’s part of life and learning. Hope the problem you’ve experienced with your book is now corrected.

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